I AM STARTING A WAR AGAINST DEBT TODAY!

Today I got angry. Why? Because I had to do a payment arrangement with my electric company to avoid having my service shut off by the end of the month.

First a little background. I am a divorced mom of 4. I have 2 grandchildren and 2 more on the way. My three oldest kids are on their own. I have my 12 yr old at home with me. When I left my husband (it isn't important why I left - I just did) we sold the house. I got nothing out of it which was OK with me. I just wanted my sanity and my freedom.

My 12 yr old and I moved into an apt with electric heat. The rent (800.00 a month) was reasonable for our area (Southwestern NH), and I liked the central location of the building. We have a 2 bedroom apt with a livingroom, kitchen and bathroom. Nice and small and compact. Hardwood floors, carpet in the livingroom, tile looking linoleum in the kitchen, linoleum in the bathroom. On the south facing side of the building (I love that - afternoon warmth!). 3rd floor. Figured it would be warmer in the winter, ok in the summer with A/C's.

Now back to why I am angry.

My highest electric bill was $232.00 for one month this winter and I had similar but smaller bills for January and Febuary. Steadily dropping with the warmer weather but I haven't been able to get caught up so I did the payment arrangement.

I am angry because 1. it is so high to begin with but 2. mainly because I didn't/couldn't pay it the way I wanted to.

I have a lot of bills. Student loans, old credit cards in collections (1st ex was supposed to pay those in the divorce but never did and I got stuck with them on my credit report), miscellaneous stupid bills I never should have run up to begin with but did, and medical bills.

The bills are, quite frankly, pissing me off. I want them gone. I don't want to have to struggle to pay my electric bill anymore or my cable bill (just paid that to avoid shut off also), or any bill.

I have been reading a book from Dave Ramsay which I am going to put into effect. I am tired of struggling and not making ends meet every month. I do get child support (1st ex owes me over $20,000 in back support and I get it for my 12 yr old) and I work full time and make pretty good money.

I know that a lot of my problem with money is WANT. I want something and I want it right then and there. I don't like to wait. Patience is not one of my better virtues. I don't think it really ever has been. Hence, the problems with the older credit cards from my 1st marriage. We were both WANT people. Not a good combination.

But I digress. That past is the past and I know what I need to do to change it to make my future better and brighter and to hopefully teach my children to not do the things I have done regarding money.

So tonight I will go home, gather all my bills, separate and organize them (should only take about 3-4 hours - ugh) and set up a budget. The dreaded B word.

I will be posting a full accounting of what I owe, amounts owed, and dates I hope to have them paid off by.

I am going to start using my ING account again. My goal? $1000.00 for a safety net (Dave recommends that amount be saved before you start the snowball debt payoff process).

My ultimate goal is to be able to have 6 months of living expenses saved, bills paid off, and to buy a house again within the next 6-7 years.

I am determined, angry, and willing to change my life to make it happen.

As the saying goes ..... If you want to live like no one else you have to live like no one else.